Waiting through my winter

Waiting is such an interminable word. A Biblical word. A patient word. Just ask any small child counting down the days until their birthday or Christmas morning.

Even as adults, all of our lives are lived season by season - times to walk through, learning all we can so that we might best face the next season of our lives. But sometimes our current season is long and painful, sad, and on the surface, so very hopeless. And yet, it is these times that I believe the Lord is closest to our hearts. He knows our pain and sorrow, loneliness and lack of strength, but thankfully he knew no hopeless - He knew that salvation would come - just as He knows that the seasons of our lives will come and go and that which looks so bleak today could become tomorrow's joy.

My hope is in Him - that the winter season I walk in will someday soon turn to joy and light.

“Hear, O Lord, and be gracious to me;
O Lord, be my helper.”
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness,
 That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever.
Psalm 30:10-12 NIV

Dark days and promises

I really can't imagine what it was like - those days when Jesus was in the tomb. He had foreshadowed the upcoming events to His closest and beloved believers, even spelled out the events in detail. But, oh, how their hearts must have ached when His presence was gone and these things came to pass. Though His followers knew, they had to be in shock that these things actually did take place. How could it be that He was gone? These must have been the longest, darkest three days of their lives.

Sometimes we feel like that, too. We often know, a foreshadowing of sorts, when difficult times are coming or are at hand. And though Christ promises He sees all, it is sometimes difficult to believe that He really does have our lives in the palm of His hand. Some days, today in particular, I find it incredulous that He has ALL things under control. I know His Word is true, but when I look around at the chaos and aftermath of relationships gone wrong and the daily difficulties of life, it is as if I'm living in those three days of darkness.

I know His promises. I believe He sees all. I believe He is working a magnificent plan in my life and those around me. I just don't have His understanding, His perspective, His life-changing power in my hands. But these are just details to Him. I will trust Him for these things as I wait for that third day - that glorious, promised, earth-shattering third day.

"What a God we have! And how fortunate we are to have Him, this Father of our Master Jesus! Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now! God is keeping careful watch over us and the future. The Day is coming when you’ll have it all—life healed and whole."

1 Peter 3-5 The Message

Sweet freedom

I feel a very secret chamber of my heart being unlocked. It is as if my Creator has said, "Come out - be free." Do I understand what this all means? Certainly not, but I have been hidden away for so long - too long - and I really don't even know who I am anymore. Jesus gives me the ability and the freedom and the wisdom to be all that He has created me to be. My thoughts matter, my heart condition is important to the Lover of my soul. And I am so grateful.

I am the daughter of the Most High God and King and that puts priestly blood in my veins. I was created for purpose, for His mission. I answer His call willingly, knowing fully that He has not forgotten me and He will restore all that has been stolen and will use it ALL for His good.

Yes, that chamber of my heart is being opened up and swept clean to make more room for Him. In that I rejoice. And, I will praise His name forever.

 “Am I not a God near at hand”
    “and not a God far off? 
“Can anyone hide out in a corner
    where I can’t see him?
“Am I not present everywhere,
    whether seen or unseen?”

Jeremiah 23:23-27 The Message (MSG)